Not quite the right season, is it? What I should give you is a story called “The Blue Vase”, but what you see is what you get today: My writing course exercise 1 (Dialogue; working title = breaking up).
”I am damn sorry, but I don´t really believe in all this any more.”
“What do you mean?”
Larry indicates the red farm bathed in the April sun. “This. Us.” I have never noticed before that his shoulders stoop.
I plant the spade in the vegetable patch and lean against the handle. Nearly two hundred square metres newly dug mould.
”Well, it doesn´t really swing any more, does it? What I mean is, what is left between us, except work, work, work?”
And now I am supposed to start crying or yelling.
“Liz, for crap´s sake … You must also have noticed that the spark has gone. “
“Nope.” I am not looking at him but the farmhouse with the freshly painted windows.
“Oh, it is just impossible to discuss with you!” He has run out of words, and he turns around while I pull the spade out of the ground.
Afterwards, I clean the spade before I continue my spring work.
And this was the tight and concise ending. But if you bother me, I may be persuaded to add the humorous one tomorrow.
lørdag den 31. oktober 2009
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10 kommentarer:
Oh, that's a *great* ending, Dorte! I'd love to read your humorous one, too *bother, bother, bother*, but this is very neatly done.
Margot: oh, Blogger seems willing to let me in now! (I have been shut out of my own blog most of the day. Scary!)
Thank you. I know this ending is the neat one which is why I decided to stop there, but I wouldn´t be me if I didn´t add a touch of humour now and then.
what a gruesome intimation of what may have happened!
Kerrie: oh, I like perceptive readers ;D
Shut out of blogger all day long, Halloween and then your frightening ending I am very very scared.
Poor you, Norman!
I also feel very frightened when Blogger won´t acknowledge me and my blog. I am not afraid of the monsters I have created myself, however. (To be honest, I like being able to scare people a little bit).
Very good Dorte, I really enjoyed this and we still have the blue vase to look forward to. Good luck with your writing course.
Hi Petty Witter.
Thank you. And it is good that there are people who are looking forward to the vase (don´t really know if I am, but perhaps my muse could hit me on the head with it).
Dorte, I was shut out of my blog(s) most of the day yesterday as well. I am glad to hear that it also happened to you, which means that it is not a problem with my computer but a Blogspot-problem.
Also, I really did like your tight and somewhat chilling ending :-)
Louise, someone in my friend feed room told me that Blogger was down so I was forewarned.
I am glad you like the tight ending, but if you should want the joke also I just posted it.
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