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When Toffee Brown moved to Knavesborough, no one noticed her the first few weeks. She could just as well have been a ghost. Perhaps she was? No, surely she would have noticed. She tried to poke a finger through her own body and wailed loudly. These country bumpkins just chose to ignore her! How inconsiderate!
She, however, noticed her neighbour in the adjacent house. The blind man in the wheelchair with the afghan coverlet and the blue-eyed cat constantly on his lap. She especially noticed that each time they passed each other on the pavement, the cat ignored her, but the man seemed to be following her with his eyes, but of course that was impossible. Toffee, you are losing it, she whispered to herself.
Every day she made up her face as carefully as always, she did her white hair and put on her tailored, pink coat before she went out to walk Tweedledee, her snow white Pekinese. But invariably, her new neighbours would pay more attention to Tweedle than to herself. Especially the cat which glared as if it wanted to pounce on her poor little doggie. And she had a creepy feeling that its blind owner was laughing at her.
Whenever she passed a shop window, she checked her elegant figure among the glittering Christmas decorations and made sure her beret sat at just the right angle. Nothing wrong with her, as far as she could see.
“Trimming our feathers, are we?”
Toffee jumped, sure she was going to have a heart attack.
“Didn´t mean to scare you, Ms Brown. I am Agatha Mistletoe, your new neighbour. Jim Partridge´s nurse.” Miss Mistletoe´s creased face cracked up in a broad smile much like the vigilant cat´s.
“Oh, the gentleman in the wheelchair?” Toffee was not sure he was what she´d consider a real gentleman, but she never forgot her manners.
“Sure.” Miss Mistletoe barked. “Mr Partridge is our local antique dealer. Old knick-knacks are his speciality.” She tilted her head and sized Toffee up.
“Have a good day, Miss Thistlemoe.” Toffee spun around and dragged Tweedledee back so fast his short legs hardly touched the pavement, wishing she had never heard about Knavesborough.
7 kommentarer:
Dorte - Oh, I am already drawn in!! I think what I like especially are the touches of humour and the fact that in a small village like Knavesborough, no-one's noticed Toffee yet except the nurse. What a neat stroke of a clue to let the reader know something is simply not right.
You definitely have my attention. Looking forward to the rest. So many questions to be answered and more to ponder. Enjoyed it very much. Thanks. :)
Mason
Thoughts in Progress
Yes, I'm another one hooked. Where will it all end? I'm intrigued that the cat doesn't seem to notice anything amiss - what a interesting touch. Looking forward to part two.
Dorte, I thoroughly enjoyed this piece - it had me hooting with laughter. Miss Thistlemoe!
Look forward to more ...
I am glad you liked my rather quiet opening scene - and Miss Thistlemoe ;D
This is off to a great start! How fun that you're using all our suggestions, too.
:)
Kelly: I could not include everything that everybody said, but I have used parts of all your suggestions. Actually, that´s what makes it fun to write them.
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